Tuesday, 22 November 2011

Match of the Day dons new home kit


SEVERAL months behind schedule, November saw Match of the Day finally bid farewell to London's TC5 and head north to Salford’s MediaCityUk. After Thought hears from Series Producer Ian Finch why the new Manchester home has been worth the wait.

Throughout October whilst the nation watched Gary & co. live from London, Match of the Day series producer Ian Finch and his team were working on unwatched tester shows behind the closed doors of their new Salford studios. The ‘dummy runs' they produced were Ian’s final opportunity of ensuring the seamless transition of Match of the Day, mid season.  

“We wanted to test the edits, VT editors, studio facilities and technical infrastructure of the new studio. The majority of our problems surrounded VT with Avids crashing, incoming lines breaking up and problems with ingesting material. Those four weeks also helped us get some of our newer staff fully up to speed; roughly 65 per cent of our staff have made the move north. It also gave me the opportunity to test out our new graphical look ‘on-air’, so I was able to tweak, adjust and reject various elements.” 

As well as aiding the BBC in spreading the spend of the license fee, it was felt that a move to Salford’s brand new HD facilities “would make more sense” than a patch up of the ageing TC5. Designed by Peter Aston of BDA Set Design, the new studios received a Craft & Design nomination at this week’s RTS Awards. The upgrade of the technologies at Ian’s disposal were significant:

“TC5 was really beginning to show its age with an old vision mixer, talkback units and glass monitors – the majority of which weren’t even in widescreen. We couldn’t produce HD programmes unless we hired in additional equipment at extra cost. In Salford, everything is HD – high definition cameras, more precise lighting, 5.1 surround sound plus full HD graphics. The production galleries have huge multiviewer screens that can be designed to the director’s preference, the vision mixer is the latest Sony model and the talkback units are state of the art .We also have access to two servers to run our studio backgrounds and programme wipes from – in London, these were powered by PVRs.” 

The benefits aren’t purely technical, as Ian explains:

“We are now more joined up as a department. In London, VT was on the opposite side of the building to where the studio was based and our offices were miles away again. Now it’s just down the corridor from the studio and production office so it’s much easier to keep across everything. We’re also much closer to our colleagues in radio and online, so there’s a greater opportunity to share material and cut down on duplication.”

And the best perk to leaving London?

“The traffic is so much easier to deal with! Everything is up and working now; people have found the transition rather easy and we’re all very happy with the set-up.”

Thursday, 17 November 2011


Feeling the squeeze

A REPORT to be published this week by the Royal College of Midwives (RCM) will call for the Government to employ 5,000 additional midwives in response to record birth rates and a workforce ripe for retirement. Nottingham’s midwives (names have been changed) tell David Cornish that conditions are already unsafe, unrealistic and unfair.
THE STORY SO FAR
·         January 2010 – David Cameron makes pre-election pledge for 3,000 more midwives.
·         February 2011 – Health Minister Anne Milton backtracks on pledge, telling the Commons: “Complete and absolute focus on staffing numbers is ­totally ridiculous... We are determined that staffing rates should be calculated purely on how many staff are needed to provide safe, quality care.”
·         October 2011 – RCM release annual birth rate statistics, indicating that an additional 4,700 midwives are required to keep up with a ‘rocketing’ birth rate.
·         September 2011 – East Midlands is identified as the worst affected area in England, requiring 41 per cent more midwives. The month also sees the RCM release a survey of the heads of midwifery in England. Over a third anticipate that they will have to cut staff in the next 12 months. Nearly two-thirds comment that their staffing levels are not enough to cope with the demands on their services.
·         November 15th-16th 2011 – RCM annual conference and publication of new report on the state of midwifery.
“I think it’s more common for it to be unsafe than safe now. More often than not you find yourself working a thirteen hour shift without a single break for a drink of water. You finish your day thinking ‘Wow, I didn’t kill anyone today’. I’ve felt that I’ve given substandard care.”

Kate Drewson has been a qualified midwife for just over two years, and now works on the maternity unit of the Queen’s Medical Centre, Nottingham. Stressful days are standard practice for Kate, working in the most understaffed region of England. Before the health trusts of the East Midlands can ensure mothers receive safe, high quality care, 600 additional midwives are required.

Sophie Bellinger also works at Queen’s. Having qualified this year, she knows no alternative to the staffing shortages. “We’re supposed to have two 20 minute breaks during our 12 and a half hour shift, but we rarely do.”

It soon adds up. Over the course of a month Sarah recorded that she had worked the equivalent of two shifts in missed breaks. Not only did she miss out on pay, but she couldn’t guarantee that she was giving ‘safe, quality care’.    

“Yesterday I didn’t have a break all day. It was like a traffic jam. I was caring for six women. It’s unrealistic that one midwife can provide care to so many women and so many babies. Mistakes are being made, but it’s because of the work load we’re being expected to handle.”

Sarah Tebbton, a midwife at Nottingham City hospital, holds similar concerns: “It’s not just because of the number of babies being born, it’s also the change in the health of the nation. We’re seeing far more complicated and high-risk pregnancies as a result of obesity, smoking, and older mothers. These complications result in more time being spent with those women, while healthier mothers have less contact with their midwife.”

THE midwives are unanimous as to where the responsibility for the staff shortages lies: the Government. Kate feels that they’re dodging the issue: “They say we shouldn’t focus on staffing numbers – but that’s not true. So many of the problems we face result from a lack of staff. There are midwives qualifying and not getting jobs. They aren’t putting money into the pot.”

For Sophie, the solution is a straight forward one: “More midwives means mistakes aren’t missed and we avoid a dangerous care environment – it’s pretty simple.”

Changes to the pay structure have added to frustrations, as a ‘money saving’ scheme introduce this year altered the way in which overtime is paid. In order to work the extra hours required to cover for the gaps left by staff shortages, midwives must first sign up to the organisation NHS Professionals. This results in all overtime work being classified as a second job, which is subsequently taxed a greater amount. For midwives in Sarah’s position, the changes don’t add up: “It’s costing both us and the Government more to pay for extra shifts – why don’t they just put the money in for more midwives?”

JEANNE TARRANT is the RCM’s regional manager for the North East of England, and is only too aware of the problems the staffing shortage is creating. She hopes that these concerns will be addressed by the Government after the publication of the RCM’s latest report at next week’s annual conference in Brighton:
“We’re very disappointed by the way we have been ignored by David Cameron. He hasn’t come close to his pre-election pledge for 3,000 new midwives – I’ve no idea what he based such a figure on.”

With nearly twenty years of midwifery experience, Jeanne hasn’t known conditions like those currently faced by the nation’s midwives: “We simply can’t continue with the Government’s current level of investment in midwives given the rising birth rate and the numbers due to retire.”

Having declined to take strike action, the RCM can do little more than send out an SOS. Earlier this year, an E-Petition was posted by the general secretary of the RCM, Cathy Warwick, calling for action from the Government to prevent the cuts to the NHS from damaging maternity care.

100,000 signatures are required before the Commons debate the issue of employing 5,000 more midwives. The number of signatures currently stands at 15,639.

“We desperately need people to sign the petition,” says Jeanne. “What I see is midwives working really hard. They’re on their knees, and the RCM doesn’t want them to think that their efforts are in vain.”
To sign the E-Petition, visit the Directgov website at http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/13716

Friday, 11 November 2011

Green (but no yellow)

Today saw George Osborne (the man tasked with overseeing where the Government puts its/our money)  unveiled the promising news that £103 million is to be put directly into funding renewable energy in Scotland.

Superb. Green energy means less carbon, less reliance upon oil and all the political fluff that such a reliance creates, and more jobs for people to build it and work out how we get the best out of renewable sources of energy.

Yet the best aspect of the story is the humorous and telling omission made by the Scottish Finance Secretary John Swinney:

"Scotland has the natural renewable resources to become the green energy powerhouse of Europe using all forms of renewables including hydro, wave, tidal, onshore and offshore wind."
Er... all of them Mr Swinney?

"Yep, all forms of renewables. We've got 'em. The good old Scots. Loads'a wind. Loads'a waves. All that stuff."

What about solar Mr Swinney?

"Eh?"

Solar energy. Harnessing the power of the sun to meet our energy needs? Have you got any sun in Scotland?

"Ah... We have MOST forms of renewables..."

And finally, for your pleasure, a joke:

Thursday, 10 November 2011

The Boy with Tape on his Face INTERVIEW


“I got bored of being a run of the mill talking comedian, so I decided to tape my mouth shut.”

Stand up comedy usually involves people telling it like it is, but you won’t get a thing out of Sam Wills.
Wills began his career as a circus act and comedy performer in his native New Zealand. Having collected numerous awards and becoming a well known name on the NZ comedy circuit, he left for London in 2008. Better know as ‘The Boy with tape on his face’, Wills was catapulted from a position of relative ‘Fringe’ obscurity to TV fame when he appeared on this year’s principal BBC Comedy Prom at London’s Royal Albert Hall.
Shortly before he plays his first Nottingham gig at The Glee Club, David Cornish quizzes The Boy about comedy, life and tape.

Do you enjoy living and working in London? 
There are more shows to be done over here and you can access the rest of the world pretty easily compared to New Zealand. 

What drew you to a career in mime and circus performing?
When I was little I was given a magic set as a present. Through learning the various tricks I was introduced to a clown, who in turn pointed me in the direction of a circus school. It was there that I discovered an alternative sideshow that opened up the doors of stand-up comedy.

When putting together routines for 'The Boy with Tape on His Face', what inspirations do you draw on?
I listen to a lot of music and sometimes an idea will just spark. Sometimes I get my inspiration from walking around small hardware shops.

Do you think that circus acts and street performers are a dying breed? How much life is there in the industry?
Far from it! Circus schools all over the world are pumping out many highly skilled performers. Many of them don't end up working in circuses, so they develop street performing acts instead.

What's the hardest aspect of your job?
Most people think that I spend all my time onstage having fun. In reality, I’m usually at my computer working out a routine and digging through different notes that I’ve taken. I like to use lists...many, many lists. I would say the hours that I put into developing a show is the real killer, and the fact that I find it hard to shut my brain down. I can’t not think about show stuff.

Do you find it hard to get gigs as a 'comedy mime act'?
Far from it. The biggest problem I have at the moment is trying to find when I can get some time off. I’m thinking 2015…

Tell me about the worst day in your career?
That would have to have been the very first day that I decided that I wanted to be a professional entertainer. I made the decision, opened my diary and realised I had nothing booked. Curses.

And the best day?
I’m still waiting for it to happen. Then I’ll stop.

What's your dream?
To wake up.

If you weren't in this line of work, what do you think you'd be doing?
I’d be running a bookshop that sells good coffee.

You can catch Sam as ‘The Boy with tape on his face’ on Thursday 10th November at Nottingham’s Glee Club. 

Thursday, 3 November 2011

Dark thoughts of a stranger

Most people are nice. We don't think to assume anything different. But some of them could be crazy. Especially the total strangers who seem to hang around in bars on their own hoping to hook up with anything of the XX chromosome variety. Here is what I believe those creeps could really be thinking when they lay their smooth moves on those lovely ladies:



What he says                                                    What he's thinking


Your place or mine?
I never leave finger prints

Can I buy you a drink?
Yes means yes

You're fit
I'm concerned you might attempt to out run me


Have I seen you somewhere before?
I'm worried you might have recognised me when I was going through your bins

I'd love to see you naked
I'm going to wait until you're asleep and take photos

Want to stay over? You won't want to leave...
You're going in the boot of my car 

I can leave you breathless 
I'm into asphyxiation 

I want to know what makes you tick
I'm going to cut you open

I want to get under your skin
Literally 

Or, he's just a lonely guy trying his best. But you never know.

Tuesday, 1 November 2011

Reclaiming Language

A series of comics illustrating my mission to reclaim the English Language from misuse and smut: